As the upper elementary school prepares for their end-of-grade tests and our fifth graders prepare to move on to new schools, thoughts about what helps a child reach their fullest potential in school are even more on our minds. Finding the most helpful ways to encourage academic investment and achievement depends on a child’s cognitive abilities as well as various emotional factors. In some cases, a child’s difficulty with academic tasks stems not from learning differences, but rather from their emotional responses to the tasks. This month, we will explore some of the areas of early emotional development that influence and support later academic performance.
What makes a “well-performing” student?
Some children are able to make use of statements such as “Do your best!” to pull themselves together and produce their best work, while others are left struggling with their schoolwork despite words of encouragement. Many of the attributes of strong and resilient students begin to form long before children enter kindergarten. The skills develop over time and continue to take shape over the course of a child’s school career. At the core, strong students are comfortable with their independence, are able and willing to tackle and solve problems, can contain, manage, and tolerate feelings such as frustration, disappointment, or self-doubt when solutions are not immediately found, and are intrinsically motivated and invested in their learning. In addition, a child’s capacity to use their imagination aids in their creativity and flexibility in problem-solving.
The roots of academic success in early childhood
As children become increasingly independent in early childhood, they encounter and learn to work through various feelings in their play and social interactions as well as in their development of self-care skills (such as cleaning up or getting dressed). As simple as it may seem, a young child’s ability to comfortably play independently, whether alone or alongside a peer, or cope with the frustration of a self-care task such as a zipper or learning to tie shoes (and stick with the task until they get it) can be indicators of how well they will adjust to the demands of being an independent student.
Parents can support their child’s emotional development and their emerging comfort with autonomy by paying attention to emotional tasks and challenges in early childhood. Admiration (and praise) that is specific to the emotional task at hand (persisting despite frustration with a zipper, for example) rather than focusing on the actual task (zipping), is one way to esteem the development of qualities of a strong student. “I’m impressed with how you didn’t give up on that tricky zipper!” has a more lasting effect, for example, than a simple “Good job!” You can also watch for clues about their emotional experiences in a variety of settings:
– Is your child comfortable with playing independently, or do they turn to you (or leave the play) when they encounter a challenging situation?
– How independent is your child with self-care tasks?
– Do they give up easily or do they persist through challenging tasks?
For parents of school-aged children
If words of encouragement don’t seem to be enough when your school-aged child is challenged by their schoolwork, the underlying emotional reasons for difficulties in school may benefit from some attention. Looking beyond the surface to find the roots of school-related difficulties will help you determine what type of help (and what words) might be most effective. Has there been a sudden change in investment in schoolwork or have there been struggles for some time? If you are able to pinpoint a more recent environmental cause, such as a move or the birth of a sibling, simply talking openly about the apparent causes may be helpful, helping a child notice that when there is more on their emotional plate, their ability to focus and persist through challenges is affected.
For other children, the struggles may stem from a longstanding emotional pattern. When you reflect on your child’s earlier years, were they comfortable persisting with tasks such as a zipper, or did they give up easily and often turn to you when faced with a challenge? Conversations about how they feel when faced with a new or challenging task can begin to uncover what is at the root – is it frustration? Self-doubt? A sense of loneliness when the task is challenging? Your child’s teacher(s) and therapist may be able to provide examples of how their performance and ways of approaching academic tasks are understood and talked about in school. Their insight may help shed light on the feelings that get stirred up when a child is faced with challenges or tasks that cause self-doubt, frustration, or other uncomfortable emotional experiences. As we’ve discussed in previous topics, helping a child with the root cause of the behavior will have deeper impact and a better chance at providing lasting relief for their inner world.
